J's just called to say he's not sure about things and that he doesn't think I have the extra thing that makes him want to be in a relationship with me as opposed to just friends.

He said this last night on the phone and I went round and we talked for hours about everything, him being worried about the job, we even talked about what I put in my post the other day about how I'd been feeling vulnerable. We ended up saying that now we'd got it all out in the open we'd start afresh with a clean slate. We were going to go out for dinner tonight.

However he has just called me to say that he is not really sure after all. That the excitement that was there to begin with has gone and that there's nothing there to replace it. I tried to say that once everything settled down with the job etc that other feelings come to replace it but he said from past experience if they weren't there now they'd never come.

I said why were you saying the things you did last night then, you said I should be optimistic. He said that that was the thing, that when he's with me he has a great time and we get on well but then when we're apart he starts to doubt things.

So there we go.